Wednesday, February 25, 2009

a small request for my blobbies....

Lovee and I watched a movie last night on HBO. I have no words to describe my feelings through it all. To say I had the dreaded 'throat lump' all the way through it comes close though.

It's called "Taking Chance".

It's a must see even if you do cry and feel horrible....because afterwards you'll feel humble and in awe and you will never be the same. Seriously.

It's a story about a Marine Colonel who volunteers to escort a fallen Marine home and his journey getting there.

I'm a Marine wife. I had one son in the Army and another in the Marines. My brother was killed in 67 in Viet Nam.
I had no clue that there was such a process.
Not a clue.

Please watch it. In my humble opinion it's a must see for the entire country.

Semper Fi

I'm back!!!

Guess what I didn't take to Denver........my camera!!!
OMG!! .......seriously.......I looked all over for it for days before I left and couldn't find the damn thing! SFD!

Had a fabulous flight there and back. Completely surprised myself by being calm. Of course the fact that I had a double 7&7 before each flight probably helped. lol
Denver airport was actually fairly easy to figure out. Did you know they have a 'smoking lounge'...? yep.....used it before I left Monday! ha...imagine that!

When sisterlittle pulled up to get me the first words I said were " Hey skiny bitch"...lol
There was a gal on the curb waiting for her ride who started laughing and said " Your sister?"
I said yep ....she said she says the same thing to her sister. LMAO..........good times.

Had the most fabulous time with her. The party Friday night to celebrate her divorce which was official on thursday...and my arrival was the bestest! She has an amazing group of friends..so supportive and caring and fun and loud when they're drunk. lol....who knew teachers were such partiers?
We shopped and shopped and ate and shopped and talked and talked.........slept a wee bit too. :) Her house is absolutely perfect for her. Exactly her style and since she was an interior designer before she became a teacher.....it's decorated perfectly. LOVE IT!!!

But no pictures.:(
I was going to buy a disposable one but never got around to it. Dammit! We did buy her one but she didn't have time to learn it. :(
Next time.....
We've aleady decided that I'll go back next year for the 'anniversary' party!

Lovee was wonderful to the parentals of course. He got to skip church on Sunday though. He was working on a project and asked if they would skip church so he could finish before I got home and they agreed.
We have a 3 car garage and the 3rd garage side is his workshop.....we've been talking about building a wall so all the wood dust wouldn't fly all over.....and he did! OMG.,.....it's perfect. He's got all his tools....tons of tools and woodworking equipment all organized........wow! He's just amazing.
I sooooo missed him though. I really don't like going places w/o him. I miss him terribly. But......sometimes I gotta. Sisterlittle needed me and I needed to see her. So..........

Anywho, Im officially back.
The washing machine is humming.....pooches are running in and out...HGTV is on the television... the bed's made...bills are paid.....I'm ready to head out to the parentals....uh-O...
Oh shit!!.......I haven't done my paint and spackle yet.....SFD!
Gotta jet..........

I'll try and catch up with everyone later on .....I missed ya'll......;)

P.S. Found the camera the night I got back! It was in my sewingroom! Right where I left it after taking a pic of my Sunshine gal sewing. Imagine that! UGH!....my grape is so grapey at times :)

Thursday, February 19, 2009

My yesterday, today and tomorrow....


Yesterday, the Dad walked over to me with newspaper in hand and says
" TT, are you busy?"
" Nope, what ya need?"
" Well, ( insert slight giggle ) read this article, it starts here(pointing) and tell me if you can figure out what the hell it says. (giggle) I can't figure out what it means."
" Ok....( reading)"

A few minutes pass...............while the Mom say to mute the TV.......she wants to listen.

"Well, it's just talking about how a guy lost 3 friends to a shooting....and how the shooting happened."
" But who are all those people they're talking about?"
" "The people who died, the person who did the shooting and how he was caught...how the people are related. There are a lot of different names mentioned.....they were related but had different last names."
" Well, I couldn't follow it. It's not written very well I don't think."
" No it's not Dad........It was hard for me to follow too.'
" Ok, I thought it was just me"
" Nope......the writer added too much information."
"Well, ok. I just couldn't figure out what was going on"
" that's ok......it's the writers fault not yours."
" Well, ok."
Mom says nothing...........hummmmmm....

Now........looks like a short conversation right? Nope. It actually went on for about 30 minutes! Seriously. From "well, I couldn't follow it"................to "Well, ok." .....took 30 minutes. Looping,looping.looping...................
It's wonderful that he still reads. Tries to keep up on current events and still tries to process it all. Kudos to him I say.

This is a regular happening. My life as an explainer; justifier; Reassuring that everything is 'ok.'

It hurts my heart to see him struggle while his mind slips away. But, I'm comforted by the fact that I'm here to help guide him through it all.
Comforted and tired. So, tired.
Dementia..........it's a horrible thing to watch.....day after day....knowing I have no power to stop it's ugly process.

I'm ready to see my sisterlittle.
I need just a wee break. And because of my sweet Lovee, I get one.

Watch out Denver!!!!!! Here comes TT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

A wee grape squish.....

Well, Valentines day was totally fabulous!!!!! Lovee sent a quartet to sing to the Mom and me!!!! Can you imagine??? It was so cute. they sang "Let me call you sweetheart". I cried of course, cuz I'm a crier. Seriously...I cry during OnStar commercials.....McDonald's commercials...you name it...I cry. It's just what I do. Fact, there are time I want to talk to someone and I can't because I've got that dreaded throat lump thing going on. Geesh....
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Anywho......what else???...........

Friday I leave for Denver!!!! Woo-hoo!!!!! I hate...HATE to leave Lovee. But, I'm looking forward to visiting my Sisterlittle and seeing her new digs. Her divorce is final tomorrow. She's excited to have it done! Imaging that! Lovee will takeover the 'beck and call girl' duties for me with the parentals. He's just the most fabulous husband in the world.

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My sunshine gal is finally done with her weight loss thing. Gracious sakes....she's down to a size 4!!!!! She came over this weekend so I could help her make an apron.....she's so into aprons these day....go figure.....anywho, she tried on her High School Prom dress and it's loose!!! She looks fabulous but more importantly she's healthier now. Her Diabetes risk is gone. YAY FOR THAT!!!!! I used to sew all the time. Not so much anymore. But it's fun to pass along my skills to her.
I'm still the fluffy one....sisterlittle is tiny too.......most days I'm fine with it...others, not so much. Like when I went shopping Monday looking for some new clothes...ugh!! Hated it!!! I haven't bought any everyday clothes in a long time. Now I remember why. All the meds I take have a tendency to sabotage my weight. Oh well......things could always be worse though. There are blogs I read that keep my bitching in check when it comes to body image and issues. :) Gotta keep my glass half full ya know.

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I'm sure there's more I could share, but I'm just not feeling it lately. There have been several times recently when I've tried to read blogs when I'm at the parentals...but it just gets too hard. They always....ALWAYS....have questions or 'need' me to do something whenever I try. I think they can sense when I pull the laptop out and.....it just goes to shit. Whatever....:) then at night, when I get home, well, that's my Lovee time. Should I blog or spend time with Lovee???? Guess which one wins out? lol- my sweetie!!!

Have a good one blobbies. :)

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Brains....or lack there of...

I'm not sure what made me have this particular thought. I admit that my grape goes to strange and unimaginary places sometimes.....part of my charm I think ;)

But..........I was wondering about my dogs. My Chihuahua's....Pebbles and Panda. Sometimes when we go out, Lovee leaves the TV on for them. For the noise he says. My SIL puts the Animal Planet station on for her pup....we just leave it on whatever channel we were watching.
So...while I was in my paint and spackle mode this morning....which is when my grape gets really active ( don't ask...I don't know why) I wondered if...when they look at the TV...do they ever wonder about what they're seeing? Do they think " geez...I'm glad I'm not in that box cuz it's really noisy....or......those people sure yell alot, I'm glad I'm not there....or....when they see animals, do they get curious and wish they were with them?

I know...silliness maxed out!

Which made me go to another querie. My own grape. There's some scary shit up there. Really....I spent a good part of last night telling Lovee how I'm jealous of people's brains. Musicians....using both hands AND their feet sometimes...all making different motions while reading music ( something I never could do)..and singing to boot!!!...It's like rubbing your head and patting your tummy at the same time. Doesn't work for me. imagine that! My brain just refuses to go there. And don't even get me started on Professors and politicians. Not that they're similar actually, but they all have brains that function on a completely different plane than mine does. I listen to some of them....amazed that others are actually understanding what was said and I'm just shaking my head saying " wha.....?"
I can't speak with big words and make any sense....but I can dance.
I can't do fractions to save my life....but I can dance.
Dance. It's my one talent. Or was. Tap, ballet, point..........loved and love everything about it.
Can't sing but I can hum......I'm a hummer ;)
My brain....I'm glad I've got it...it's serving me well.....but really, will I spend the rest of my life with silly thoughts?
See, even that doesn't make any sense.
What was it I did in High School anyway?..........hummmm, can't remember......
LOL

Sunday, February 1, 2009

'Grape Juice' makes Dad feel better????

Today, sitting in church waiting for all the festivities to start the Mom looks at me and says:
" Did you turn off your cell phone"
I started laughing. And answered her question with a question. I know I shouldn't do this because it's totally backfired on me before but.....it came out before I knew it...
" Do you only remember the wrongs I do?"
Well........her answer gave me pause. Seriously........
" No, it's just that they are so few that they stick in my mind. You do too many wonderful things for me to remember."

What????? did she just compliment me? I think so. A bit of a backhanded compliment but none the less, a compliment.
I just smiled and said yes it was off.
Thanks Mom.

Not sure what's going on with her lately. She will come up to me...out of the blue... put her arms around me and give me a big ol squeeze. Usually from behind so it takes me by surprise. I'm cooking or doing dishes or something.
That is out of character for her. Completely. She never was an affectionate person. Showing feelings makes her vulnerable and uncomfortable. Used to anyway. Maybe her crusty interior is crumbling. Not the exterior mind you.....she still LOOKS crusty......but inside...getting a bit mooshy. Interesting.
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Now the Dad.....he's not feeling too perky these days. Not sure what's going on there. He doesn't give in to anything though. Yesterday when I got there and asked my usual..... "How are my parents?" Mom gave her usual reply of " Ok..got up hurting but I'm ok now" Dad's usual is " tolerable,tolerable...." but yesterday he said he was "sort of dizzy feeling". Hummmm.......
His sugar was a bit lower than normal for him so I got him some orange juice and he said he was ready to go to breakfast. "Can't make your Mom wait too much longer for her breakfast" he said. So off we went. He still felt dizzy afterwards but he wanted to go to the mall for their daily walk. So off we went. He felt a bit better when we got home.
This morning I asked the usual question....and his answer was " I didn't feel good last night...I almost woke your mother up to have her check my temperature."

Mom: Don't wake me up to read that thing cause I can't see it...and why didn't you tell me you felt bad?"
Dad: "You didn't ask."
Mom: "Well, what was wrong and how are you now?"
Dad :" I just felt all warm and sort of tinglie...all over...and my head hurt. I thought I might have a temp-a-ture" ( that's how he says it...lol)
Mom: "you're fine now right?"
Dad: Well, not really. Are we ready to go?"
Me: Are you sure you feel up to going? Maybe we should stay here and rest."
Dad: No, you're Mother is ready so let's go."
Mom: Ok, let's go."

So, off we went. He was better afterwards. He said the grape juice gave him a boost. Ha....it was Communion Sunday.....I thought of my blob!!

See, he just doesn't give in.
The Mom....she gives in alot.

Interesting