Thursday, February 19, 2009

My yesterday, today and tomorrow....


Yesterday, the Dad walked over to me with newspaper in hand and says
" TT, are you busy?"
" Nope, what ya need?"
" Well, ( insert slight giggle ) read this article, it starts here(pointing) and tell me if you can figure out what the hell it says. (giggle) I can't figure out what it means."
" Ok....( reading)"

A few minutes pass...............while the Mom say to mute the TV.......she wants to listen.

"Well, it's just talking about how a guy lost 3 friends to a shooting....and how the shooting happened."
" But who are all those people they're talking about?"
" "The people who died, the person who did the shooting and how he was caught...how the people are related. There are a lot of different names mentioned.....they were related but had different last names."
" Well, I couldn't follow it. It's not written very well I don't think."
" No it's not Dad........It was hard for me to follow too.'
" Ok, I thought it was just me"
" Nope......the writer added too much information."
"Well, ok. I just couldn't figure out what was going on"
" that's ok......it's the writers fault not yours."
" Well, ok."
Mom says nothing...........hummmmmm....

Now........looks like a short conversation right? Nope. It actually went on for about 30 minutes! Seriously. From "well, I couldn't follow it"................to "Well, ok." .....took 30 minutes. Looping,looping.looping...................
It's wonderful that he still reads. Tries to keep up on current events and still tries to process it all. Kudos to him I say.

This is a regular happening. My life as an explainer; justifier; Reassuring that everything is 'ok.'

It hurts my heart to see him struggle while his mind slips away. But, I'm comforted by the fact that I'm here to help guide him through it all.
Comforted and tired. So, tired.
Dementia..........it's a horrible thing to watch.....day after day....knowing I have no power to stop it's ugly process.

I'm ready to see my sisterlittle.
I need just a wee break. And because of my sweet Lovee, I get one.

Watch out Denver!!!!!! Here comes TT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

9 comments:

fiwa said...

That's a hard situation. Hugs to you, honey.

I hope you enjoy your time with your sis in Denver!

love,
fiwa

Jay said...

I've been there before too. The looping conversation that seems like it will never end.

"So you don't know who that person they talked about in the paper is?"

"Nope, he's not from here."

"So you didn't go to school with him?"

"Nope, he's not from here."

LOL

Have fun in Denver!

CheekyMonkey said...

You're an amazingly strong woman TT...we're all fortunate to have you in our lives, but your father... he's the luckiest (and moms, of course). So patient and loving...

Until you get your hands on Denver, Meeyoooww!!!! :)

Dana said...

Have a fun and safe trip!!

Dianne said...

Denver was all excited because the Prez was there, well - they ain't seen nothing yet ;)

I love how you took the 30 minutes and do the entire loop - everyone who needs some help and care and empathy should have someone like you

The Queen said...

TT. ya know I love ya girl.. and ya know I try really hard to never say a bad word about ya girl... but.... well... I must say....

I think you are showing a little toooooo much leg over at the Princess's Castle....I mean really woman.....

just stopped to cheer you up.. make ya laugh... and send you over to the Princess's Castle to REALLY REALLY laugh... and don't have spit on the computer screen..and um... you look HOT there so you might want to take Lovee with you...

kcinnova said...

I think your dad just killed my writing career... oh, wait... I didn't have one, because I am full of too many details and rabbit trails. It's genetic - my mom does it, too, and it drives me crazy.

You are one patient chickie. Your parents are blessed to have you!

Diane J Standiford said...

My mother-out-law (I'm not allowed to marry ya know)used to call me daily and loop; her daughters at work, I never minded...she was always a bit loopy anyway.

fiwa said...

Hey TT, do you by chance know what happened to "Glass Half Empty" - JezDez? When I got back from vacation I tried to click on her blog, and it seems to be gone? I just wondered if you knew.

Thanks!
fiwa