Saturday, November 10, 2007

This won't leave my grape...so I'll squish it a bit...it has to be in print!

One day,Sisterlittle, asked the folks if they wanted anything special for their funeral. My Mom says she wants the Choir Director at their church to sing Amazing Grace at hers. My Dad said he remembered a funeral he went to where the Mans girls spoke about him. He thought that was real nice so maybe we could do that. Geesh....we wondered how we would be able to accomplish something like that at what will be such a throat-lumping time. And, what would we say? Would we take turns talking?.....write out something before hand ( as if) or be spontaneous?...what if we broke down and just couldn't follow through. How could we live with ourselves if, the last thing he asked of us,.... we failed.?....
Ever since that time, this has been on my mind. Not a day goes by that I don't think about it. Especially now that he's looking so fragile with Shingles and being so bold and strong and not complaining. That's his way. I keep wondering what has stressed his body to allow this to come on. He's not overly tired as he gets plenty of sleep. He's not having any health issues out of the norm. So, what,....... I keep asking myself. Like I said, he's never been a complainer. But he has been known to worry. I think Mom believes she has the market cornered on that but she's wrong. Dad's a silent worrier. He keeps stuff to himself. So, now I wonder what his new worry is. It could be many things. I'll never know because he'll never tell.

So, what do we say about Daddy? Do we play the 'I remember when' game?
I remember when:
1. he ran along beside me holding up my bike while I learned to ride..
2. he used to stumble into my room at night after I called out for help during an asthma attack..and how he would sit on the side of my bed until I fell asleep again..
3. he took me to the Emergency room for stitches when I sliced my heel open even though the blood made him queasy....
4. I would wait for him to come home from work and would run outside towards him to give him a big hug and hear him say " Hey,squirt"...
5. I would go up and hug him just so I could smell him. No one smelled like my Dad and I loved his smell...
6. he got so mad at me for sassing my Mom that he spanked me with a belt. Only one whack but I was crushed.....it crushed me that I had made HIM that mad.
7. we went to the Father-Daughter Banquet for Blue Birds. We ate cold fried chicken and bread and butter and sang the song " Let me call you sweetheart" ....the part that says 'with your eyes so blue'.....we changed to say 'with your eyes so brown'......
8. We would sing in church...both out of tune and giggle the whole time...
9. My Brother was killed in Viet Nam how sad he looked when he came to the school to get us and tell us about it....
10. He walked me down the isle for my wedding to Lovee and how he squeezed my hand as he was going to sit down....
11. waiting anxiously to see approval in his eyes when he saw my first born child... and then my second....
12. I remember when I first left home to join Lovee......the first time I remember hearing him say " I love you Babe" ........
13. I remember how he kept looking older each time I saw him......
14. the look on his face whenever he thought he was telling a dirty joke....his nose wrinkled when he laughed....

I remember so much. How will I ever condense it? How will Sisterlittle and I do it?

He's is ................I don't even have a strong enough vocabulary to say what he means to me/us.

He's ..........Daddy............pure and simple. And we love him awful!

The following was a reply from Sisterlittle, which HAS to be included!!!!


Anonymous said...
wiping away tears...add to that:

15. How he tucked us in bed at night...tight as cocoons!

16. The highlight of our summers: riding the bus downtown to eat lunch with our Daddy at a "fancy" restaurant.

17. Christmas parades...

18. Teaching me to drive a stick!!!

19. Singing to ma: "Smoke...smoke...smoke that cigarette..." as we pulled into church.

20. The tears in his eyes when I graduated college.

21. Wrestling on the floor in the den. (pissed off mother good!)Remember how we would try to blow in his ear? who knew? giggling so hard we'd fart or wet our pants!

22. the loving nicknames he gave our daughters.

23. waking us up in the mornings singing..." who's that knocking at my door,who's that knocking at my door..who's that knocking at my door....it's little tt/Sisterlittle...

He loves his baby girls!

to be cont...

8 comments:

Sunshine said...

That was perfect Mom. I think Pawpaw would like that.

Anonymous said...

wiping away tears...
add to that:
15. How he tucked us in bed at night...tight as cocoons!
16. The highlight of our summers: riding the bus downtown to eat lunch with our Daddy at a "fancy" restaurant.
17. Christmas parades...
18. Teaching me to drive a stick!!!
19. Singing to ma: "Smoke...smoke...smoke that cigarette..." as we pulled into church.
20. The tears in his eyes when I graduated college.
21. Wrestling on the floor in the den. (pissed off mother good!)Remember how we would try to blow in his ear? who knew? giggling so hard we'd fart or wet our pants!
22. the loving nicknames he gave our daughters. He loves his baby girls!
to be cont...

tt said...

we need to write all this down!

Anonymous said...

I think you just did!

Alli said...

That was lovely, TT! Brought tears to my eyes.

Anonymous said...

How could I forget my Christmas "mystery" gift!?!?!?!
also, add Holy, Holy, Holy to the one about singing in church.
Should you mention Mother got her own hymnal because we were so naughty? ha!

ETK said...

Awww - my heart aches for you. Love you.

Tweb said...

I want to comment on this but seeing that I didn't have my dad there for me growing up and never had the chance to get to know him, I couldn't even bring myself to read the entire blog. I'm sure it's perfect because you are tt.