Saturday, April 28, 2007

The Universe

I wonder if the universe picks up on my random thoughts. I so believe that if you put shit "out there", ie: actions, for all to see then it's going to, one day, come flying back and kick you in the ass. But, what about thoughts. No one can see a thought. Ppl can look at my face and tell if I'm deep in thought but no one knows what those thoughts are unless I tell them right? Right! Of course if One were to constantly internalize their thoughts then eventually there could be some type of external explosion...I would think. Depending on what the thought process contained would determine whether the explosion was of vibrant colors or deep nasty gunk. I think after the explosion is when one would be able to finally come to terms with whatever was being internalized. Just like this 'virtual diary' of mine. I've discovered that whenever I take the time to write things down, I can understand whatever it is that's heavy on my mind. Untill then my grape replays, over and over, whatever it is that is so burdonsome or silly or weird...kinda like when a song gets stuck in your head and replays over and over and over. Eventually you've got to get a new song in there or the grape just turns to mush. New thoughts, different thoughts, need to enter. Maybe I need an internal sign; One that says " Happy, joyful thoughts enter here". The room for those thoughts would be huge and cavernous and bright and colorful so I would have room to roam whenever I wanted to. Then I'd need another one that said " Guilt and sorrowful thoughts enter here". That room would need to be very small and dark so I
couldn't see it very well. So dark that it would become very tiring to see the mess and I would eventually be forced to leave so that I could live again.
The universe is big. So too, is the mind. They're both hard to figure out. Deep exploration from time to time in the ways of reading, learning, listening, writing etc. are good. To know that somethings will always remain a mystery is good to understand and accept too.
Hummm, queries, posers....random universal thoughts.
Good Morning tt. Put on you smile and go take the folks to Denny's. You'll feel better knowing you helped someone today.
Needless to say my heart is heavy today. It's better than it was last night which is good.
But, on the flip side of all this rambling, I'm not sure I'm ready to write it down. I'm not quite through internalizing everything.


Sunshine said...

I'm sad to see your heart is heavy. :( Can I help?

ETK said...

I love you bunches!!!!!!!!!

Maybe you gave all your good feelings to me on the drive Thursday? I felt so pumped after our convo.

tt said...

Heart is lighter now. it really felt good to write all that down!
I LOVE u 2 bunches too!!!

Glad u were was I!!

Tweb said...

Heavy Heart? Huh... this was one of my favorite random deep thought posts of yours so far. Had my brain going in circles so I had to go back and read again... 3X. :) That could be the ADD kicking in though. Or the TV on in the background, or the lawn mower...

Squeezing the grape juice always helps. Or so I think it does, anyway.