What's in your bag???

When we're born, we don't come with instructions. We don't know exactly what lies ahead of us.
We aren't handed a nice little shiny box with everything we'll need to scatter about in making our life. It's a day by day thing.
I do think there may be a plastic bag thrown in the mix somewhere along the line. A bag with our life in it. But, because it's not in a box, neatly arranged with instructions as to when to scatter pieces of our life, some things get thrown out in a not so logical order. That is the mystery. We just reach in and grab something and toss it out and see what happens. Not on purpose mind you. It's like, we're blindfolded and can't see what's picked. If we could see, I know things would proceed more cautiously and in an order we think it should be in. That's life....chaotic and imperfect and magical all thrown in together.
We take whatever life throws at us....ever hoping for the best. Dealing with disappointments and joys and sadness, sometimes all in one day.
And so it goes.

A childhood friend of mine left us Saturday. She was only 56. A massive stroke and heart attack was the cause. I'm sure that wasn't in the plan her Mom had for her...or her children...or her brother....or her husband. I'm sure that wasn't in her plan either. The bag just emptied in an order we wish it hadn't.

We went and visited her Mom today after church. The first thing she said to my Mom was" Oh my, how'd you ever let your baby boy go? I just don't know how to do it. It's not supposed to be this way."
It has brought my brothers death to the front of Mom's mind. Mom did the best she could to comfort her...but really, what can be said.

She was only 2 years older than me. When we were small I wanted to be her. She was so pretty and popular. She didn't have that awkward stage that most of us have. She was always pretty. Sad, usually, but pretty.
Depression fell out of her bag early on. It grabbed hold of her and never quite let go. I think she forgot to grab more things out of that bag....depression puts blinders on you ...
I think sadness was all she saw.

So, I looked into my very worn bag today to see if I could get a glimpse of what may lay ahead. I saw so many possibilities. Some shiny things are there along with everyday stuff...laundry and chores...but I saw hugs and kisses......smiles and giggles....Lots and lots of love....rainbows and frogs and ladybugs.....laughter and kindness....music and wiggles....and comfort. I saw enough to make me hopeful.

That's what I wish for everyone. I hope your bag is filled with enough hopefulness to make the corners turn up everyday.


I hope I get to empty my bag before I have no more tomorrows. I know for sure, I'm going to do my best to accomplish that. If I succeed, yay for TT. If not, I hope someone grabs what's left of it and pours it out to be caught in the wind. Maybe the shiney parts will land in someone elses bag that needs it more than I did.