Thursday, March 13, 2008

Is it legal to leash your parentals??

I think I need to invent something. A leash for older people who go to the store with there caregivers! Seriously!! The parentals hadfasting blood tests this morning. The Mom actually looks forward to these b/c afterwards we go to Denny's for breakfast. Her favorite part of the week is spent there. That would be Saturday. Every Saturday!! We leave here @ 8:30 every-elfing-Saturday. ETK has joined us a few times. Good times for sure. Anyway, today after breakfast we went to the Wal-mart to pick up a couple's just across the street from Denny's. We decided from the start that we would stick together because they both needed my eyes to get their individual things. Mom needed an Easter Basket for a friends daughter. Dad needed a new combination lock for his locker at the club. I needed a few grocery items. Sounds easy enough right? WRONG!
We went to hardware first and discussed locks for about 10 minutes or so...uh-huh...10 minutes. Mom was being very patient, which is rare for her but I didn't complain. After Dad decided on which one he wanted we headed over to the grocery side to get my stuff and her Easter basket. Well, as soon as we found the baskets the Dad got antsie. He picked out a basket that had boy stuff in it...he didn't understand why we wanted 'girl' stuff. Ummm, it's for a girl Dad...not a boy...he never understood. It's all candy he says. Yes I tell him but it also has other toy stuff inside. He announces he's going up front to sit down and for me to find him when we were through. Ok....shouldn't be too hard. He has a favorite bench there. ( I's odd but you gotta remember who I'm dealing with here ;))So, Mom and i finish up and off we go( at a snails pace I might add...cuz she's using a walker ya know) and we get up front to pay and what do i see??? Not Dad that's for sure! He's no where to be found. I look all over the area and can't find him. Mom says he's probably in the restroom. Sounds likely I think so we pay for our stuff. Still no Dad. I deposit her to a bench; where the Dad SHOULD be- and go off to find him. I looked almost everywhere and was thinking about how to page him. He's near deaf and i wondered if he would even hear a page. Could I ask someone to go into the mens room and holler for him? Would he even hear it? Would it scare him? Then.....I spotted him. He's standing in the middle of the linens!! Wha......?
me: Where have you been??
Dad: What do you mean...I'm right here. Where's your Mother?
me: We already checked out..she's over on the bench where we thought you'd be. You said you'd wait up front....where were you/
Dad: I was over at the pharmacy.
me: That's the only place I didn't look! Why were you there?
Dad: Because I didn't pay for my stuff yet, you weren't here....and I didn't want to go past the checkout w/o paying..they might arrest me or I went over to the pharmacy and sat in their chair.
Me: Ok..let's check out
Dad; where's your Mother? we have to wait for her
me: we already checked out...she's waiting on a bench for us
Dad: where? i don't see her.
Me: Dad, she's ok...really....she's waiting for us on the bench....stay here and I'll go tell her I found you.....DON"T MOVE OK?!!!..........
Dad: wait you need the Money to pay for my stuff...
Me: Dad, you have the stuff and you're in line.....say here...I'll be right back.....Mom's on the move looking for us....STAY HERE!!!
Dad: What?? Where's your Mother?
me: ( hollering to Mom)---'I found him...wait right there...."
mom: ** looking around trying to find where that sound came from** "tt, is that you?"
Me: yes....stay there, I'll be back with Daddy.........
Mom: What?
Me: ...s.t.a.y.t.h.e.r.e!!
Mom: oh...ok
***running back to the Dad***
Me: Ok, we're next....where's your money?
Dad: I thought I gave it to you.. kept it.
Dad: it is ( it was in his hand)

We finally got together to leave...each one looking for the other....she asking him questions he asking her......I'm walking in front of them so they can follow my scent.... I guess......I'm talking to them so hopefully it;s my voice they're following.....we get to the car and I'm exhausted!! I asked them how come the " lets all stay together" plan didn't work.
them together: What plan?

Could I have a wee bit of cinnamon on my toast next time? Please?


Jen said...

You are a saint.

I'm just sayin'.

meno said...

I'm totally okay with you using a leash. They have some really long ones you know.

Anonymous said...

You need to get one of those electronic leashes, like the kind they use to keep track of children. An alarm sounds on a watch or PDA thing that you have if they get too far from you. Seriously, as hard as it sounds like your job is, your reward in heaven will be great. Doing the right thing works that way. Regards to Top and the 'rents

Take care

Allison Horner said...

Yes. You are a saint & have A LOT of patience.

tt said...

all:--- i'm notsaint that's for sure. A saint wouldn't vent as much as I do. I'm just doing what's right...but venting is my realease. :)
Electronic leash??? That sounds interesting. As long as there is chocolate in Heaven I'll be a happy girl!!